– By Temitayo Amushan
This is gonna be the first article I have ever written about Love, when I say “love” I mean that mutual feelings between a man and woman (at least opposite sex thing).
I can teach about faith, hope or God’s love in my dream, I can write books about hope and motivations (with GOD on my side) but you see this L.O.V.E word huh I can’t comprehend it. I have always experience God’s Love, right from the day my father’s sperm busted my mother’s egg (Lol).
Maybe it’s because while I was growing up my sweet grandmothers over spoilt me with their love, I didn’t bother to ask for tips about the other types of love.
I read fictions and I love happy ending movies. Love they say is a beautiful thing. I believe and I agree.
But again, to me it is a bad addiction, an experience I haven’t learnt from and a mistake I’m addicted to (i just don’t learn). But Ehn do you blame me? If it was Mathematics I would have learnt and memorized the best formula. I have read books and listened to “teachings” but puff, it’s all the same thing.
A friend once asked me to write an article about love for his youth conference, I declined. Told him “that area isn’t my talent” it is a topic I don’t discuss or write about.
I just feel am an amateur in that area.
Unfortunately or should I say fortunately (it might be a blessing in disguise), a little sister just mailed me asking for “love tips”. First thing I did was Laugh out loud but then I couldn’t avoid it this time around, so I decided to face it and pen some words down.
In a nutshell, this is what I think about “LOVE”…hehehe please don’t quote me ooo I know nothing. Hahahaha here we go…
Love is beautiful, sweet, sensational, adventurous, inspirational, amazing if it’s with the right person. Love can be a mistake, but it a mistake worth making until you get it right.
There ain’t no love without you first loving yourself. Most of us get into relationships for all of the wrong reasons. Your spouse won’t cure your loneliness, broken-heart or whatever problem you have. If you don’t love yourself first, you can’t ever love someone else truly. Trust me, you’re only deceiving yourself. Even the Bible said “Thy shall love your neighbor as YOU LOVE YOURSELF”
” I don’t trust people you don’t love themselves and yet tell me “I Love you” there’s an African saying “. Be careful when a naked person offers you a shirt”. You definitely can’t give what you don’t have. I have never heard anyone borrow love or even steal it.
And while we’re on the subject of morality, relationships will NEVER be clear, it isn’t the nature of things. But you can help yourself by doing an exercise; make 3 lists:
1. What you ‘want’ in the man you love?
2. What you would ‘like’ in the man you love?
3. What you will not tolerate in any man in your life?
And stick to this list…preferably the first list. Standards dictate who we let into our heart, who stays there, and who deserves to be there.
The more you compromise with these lists, the longer it will take to find your soulmate. While looking for him, never covet what another woman has. Let what is meant to be yours, come to you.
This habit people have of running in packs isn’t all that healthy either, after all the saying goes ‘relationSHIPS sink when they have too many passengers. You don’t need to let everybody in. And while you’re at it, Jealousy sucks! Try being on the receiving end of it, you’ll understand how damaging it can be to any relationship.
Spending a fun weekend with someone is not enough to know if you really like them. You only really get to know people in their reactions when things are not going their way, and over a prolonged period.
When you find that special one, please never let your pride push him or her away. Don’t ever try to eat your egg and have it. Hearts ain’t toys; don’t play games with other people’s emotions. If it goes wrong darling, move on. It ain’t the end until you stop breathing, never give up on love. It hurts but a minute with the right person will heal a decade’s hurt. So Love Love Love!!!
Be wise baby, the world is filled with wolves looking for preys.
Relationships ain’t about money, there’s more to life than the price of your weave on. Your dignity is more important than your LV purse. Honey don’t be fooled, never sell your integrity for a pair of shoe. If you can’t afford it today, you can buy the store tomorrow.
Material stuffs got no place to go, do what is right your life today and I promise you will get the best and right man for you. Don’t you dare settle for less. You’re priceless. You’re a diamond darling, let your light shine.
By Temitayo Amushan
www.aliciaamus.com
