The first stage requires little effort. We are pushed along by euphoric feelings. We commonly call this stage “being in love”.
When we are in love, we freely do things for each other without the thought of cost or sacrifice.
We will drive 500 miles or fly half way across the country in order to spend a weekend together.
The person we love seems to be perfect- at least perfect for us.
In this stage, the couple does not have to work on the relationship. They may expend great energy in doing things for each other, but they would not consider it work.
They would tend to use the word “delight”.
They feel elated with the opportunity to do something meaningful for the other person. They want to make each other happy and they often do.
But, we do not stay in the euphoric stage of love forever. Actually this is good because it is difficult to concentrate on anything else when you are in Love.
If you are in college when you fall in love, your grades will likely decline.
Tomorrow you have a test on the War of 1812. But who cares about the War of 1812 when you are in Love?
Education seems trivial; what matters is being with the person you love.
If the obsessive nature of the “in love euphoria” extended for the next twenty years, few of us would accomplish our educational and vocational potential.
When we are in love, the rest of the world doesn’t matter. We are totally focused on being with each other and making each other happy.
To be continued…