Image: Forbes.com
This particular issue needs to be dealt with. By Me? No!
By you the reader and me, the writer. It’s a prevalent issue among Christians and non-Christians alike. So when this topic was passively thrown at me by my Boss, I said to myself
“Kishi, why not write about it?”
I am Christian, I’ll try to be unbiased but then again my foundation and opinions will be based solely on God’s word, The Holy Bible.
For starters, what does the Bible say about sleeping together? And no! I don’t mean sex. I mean snoozing-spit-drooling-stretch-kicking-push-jabbing-waking up together in the same room, on the same bed sharing the same bed cover.
Pro 6:28 says “can you walk on hot coals and not get Blisters?”
We know as Christians that sex before marriage is a no-no for us. But why then do we blur the lines by putting our “bodies” in the spotlight? I get that we are Spiritual and all and we “think” we are strong enough to “shenk” every “attempt the Devil tries to make us act on our hormones”.
My people, do not set yourself up for temptation like I have done. Aside from the fact that our hormones are sometimes enraged by the subtle curveous body on the hard bed with us, it affects a whole lot of other things for us as Christians.
Sometime we believe that we aren’t going all the way so there’s no harm done, true. And whole lot of circumstances may put a lady/guy on the spot which may require either gender to pass the night at the opposite sex’s crib, again true. And there are eyes from above that sees our hearts and the pure intentions about just letting him/her pass the night (for just one night) and by the next day He/she will be on her way, again again true. But because of this ideology and knowing, a new trend has been fashioned out in Christian dating and friendship. It’s an innocent act. I totally understand, yeah?
Image: risenetworks.org
I have done this before and I must say, it is so totally wrong. Yes, it is!
I asked my best friend, a female and a few others. Here are their takes.
“I don’t see anything wrong in sleeping over; so far He’s not going to be in the room with me”
-O.O.M.A.
“For me, I can control myself. Even when this person in question is my girlfriend (points to Girlfriend) and she’s my temptation.
-EJ.
Two different thought patterns from two different two different sexes
My own though pattern?
No! You don’t really want to know. (I see eyes rolling). So you really do want to know? Alright then, here it is.
I don’t see anything wrong in sleeping over in a lady’s room or she passing the night over at my room whether I like her or not. There was a principle my family in school then adhered to and they still do too. Whenever they or I have a female friend over, I leave the room for the lady to sleep in alone or I have my other lady friends who she knows well enough sleep in too or I have both genders in the room and we all sleep in the same room (Accountability).
It pretty much seems shabby and not a matured tactic, yeah? It won’t be shabby or immature when my non-Christian neighbors accuse me of been a hypocrite when I try to tell them about Christ. My integrity, the lady’s and God’s will be laid out bare and they, my neighbors who will serve as the unquestionable-Almighty Jury will banish us away for a sin we didn’t even commit.
What am I trying to say here? Our, my, your witnessing about Christ will be questioned and the tag HYPOCRITE will be accorded me. Yes I am starting with this because I’ll have to start with God and equally end this write up with him.
Image: huffington Post
When you share a bed with someone, you are tempting yourself unnecessarily. My pastor once said that if your boyfriend or girlfriend lies down next to you without getting aroused, its either he or she doesn’t like you like that like that or he/she is gay.
So maybe that’s a little paranoia talking there. But think about it. Therein is an iota of truth. You’re lying on the same bed, in a dark or semi-dark or lit up room with that person you like (or not) and you have a sexual habit you’re trying to end, it will be difficult to set appropriate boundaries. And speaking from experience, my own hormones get in the way and win all time. No matter the prayer and fasting and word consumption have been put in place. Beeni.
It all starts by just sleeping on the same bed.
Or in compromising positions
There are eyes and hearts learning from afar about we Christians. Looking to get directions from us without asking questions. Looking at us as their perfect excuse or example. We must be mindful of that so as not to lead them to … a wrong path.
You know, myself and my sweetheart then never really discussed about sleeping in the same bed as been an intimate act but when wake up, we’d feel like crap like we did something that only married couples do. Though nothing happened.
There’s a difference, a distinction when I have my male friend(s) sleep over. We don’t get into each other’s spaces. Sleeping with someone you like or not like (but for the benefit of those of us that have sexual habits and are looking for means to zip up always) in such a close proximity is an act of trust and a situation where our guards can be let down.
It’s not about it being a stiff-necked-all-rules-regulation-log-of-wood-stereotype-kinda Relationship. It’s about honoring God and your significant other. Don’t practice what married people are doing…YET.
Enjoy having your bed to yourself. Get a Teddy bear if you want to cuddle mbok. Yes, some people do not like going to bed alone, true. But I, Iteoluwakishi, says you should enjoy it now because that Beautiful Damsel, Ogadinma-Bewaji-Yarinya that I will marry will be fighting me for bed space.
1 Thessalonians 5:22.
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